‘He’s going to grow up not knowing who he is’.

We’re a real crossroads in our life at the moment.  Us, my family.  Coming to America was only ever going to be a temporary thing.  Our three year visa was actually extended and we were granted an additional two years.  We have to leave the country by early next year.  Which brings us to now – a crossroads point in our lives where we are exploring options for what to do next, where to go next.

‘He’s going to grow up not knowing who he is’ – those words were casually yet pointedly spoken out to me last week.  A warning of sorts, by someone who cares, but a critical spirit tends to prevail at times.

Yes we may end up in another country, and not back ‘home’.  That may be where God leads us – or the doors may shut.  We’re open to whatever.  What is most important for us is to be where God leads us, where my husband’s skills can be most useful.

Our lives are not our own.  And this is what our children are seeing and learning.  This is what we hope they pick up both intentionally and through the natural process of osmosis, sponges that they are.

And so, to the words spoken as a warning, I rebuke them.

My boys will grow up knowing they are citizens of New Zealand.  Part of the Ngai Tahu tribe.  They are members of a wonderful and large extended family.  But, more importantly, they are children of God.  They have skills and talents and abilities – God given – and it is up to my husband and I to foster in them a love for learning, a love for each other and the wider world, and to develop servant’s hearts.

We are their example.

How we do things in our home, right now, at this crossroads point in our lives, sets the tone.

And so, we talk about the options we have before us.  We talk openly about God’s ability to open and close doors.  We show them that we’re praying.  We remind them of how God has always provided.  We include them in the process.   Not with every, single thing, but with hopefully a bit of wisdom and insight on our part.

And yes we are going to stuff up.  We may have to backtrack on decisions.  We may have to disappoint.  I have no doubt that my children will see me impatient and frustrated.  They will learn that things happen according to God’s timetable and not ours.  As we begin homeschooling to tide us over the transition period, crazy Mummy will no doubt raise her ugly head.

But my prayer, more than anything, is that they won’t remember the frustrations, and the ugly.  My prayer is that they will remember the adventure. They will see what amazing things happen when God takes the reigns, when we let Him lead our lives.  They will see that even in the unknowns of this crossroads time, our faith stands strong and steady.  They will know that as a family unit we are tight.  Unshakeable.  That there is strength in unity.

We are at a crossroads right now, but with God’s help, my kids are always going to know who they are, because they are mine, but more importantly – they are His.


12 thoughts on “Crossroads

  1. ahhhhhhhhhhh!!!!! So glad you’re rebuking those words… even if said with concern for you… they are rooted in fear. How about your boys will grow up knowing their identity is in Christ and Christ alone… that they will not be bound by the need for security and safety because God gave them parents who are living examples of what it means to live an abundant faithful life!! Your boys will be mightier and stronger and more courageous in the Lord BECAUSE of the example you’ve set for them… I stand in agreement with you my friend!! The will of God can be a scary place… full of risk and loss… BUT it’s also full of life, adventure and wonder… We are here to raise warriors, fishers of men, ambassadors of the love and Grace of Christ… that is the identity you are giving your boys… THAT is the legacy your lives will leave!

    • Ohhh I pray those prayers and we hold onto the promises of God…
      And I love all your encouragement and love and strength and your very own dear heart my friend.

  2. What a wonderful thing to realize where our true citizenship lies and that it is not within the territorial bounds of any nation on this planet. Our identity is the same, defined by the Word and not by human culture. Wonderful! (Found you through Kathy’s linkup)

  3. Amen! They will know who they are – we ALL learn and can know who we are – not because of some ‘home’ but because of Whose we are… and He is the One who leads and guides us and He is the only One who offers a Home that is everlasting! Loved this post… so powerful and true! Prayers as you boldly lean in for whatever it is that He has for you!

    • Thank you! Thank you for prayers, thank you for reading,thank you for understanding and thank you for commenting!

  4. yes. we can dwell on all the little things that *might* go wrong and ruin everything, OR we can stand on the One thing that will make it okay. your words show your choice. beautiful. and can i just add that they hit home for me, too? thanks for this.

    • ohhhhhh good – I don’t ever want my writing to just be all about me and my little circle of influence….glad you got something out of it too! Thanks for stopping by. I really mean that.

  5. Fi (and Mike) you’re legends! Love your willingness to listen to God & follow him. Not everyone can & does that. My parents shifted us around a lot when we were kids (led by God) and while sometimes as I child I couldn’t see the benefit or reason (I think you’re combating this by keeping your kids in the ‘loop’), I now have the beauty of hindsight & think of my parents as brave & obedient to God. What a legacy to leave! Love you both and support you in all your adventures xxx

Leave a Reply

Fill in your details below or click an icon to log in: Logo

You are commenting using your account. Log Out /  Change )

Google photo

You are commenting using your Google account. Log Out /  Change )

Twitter picture

You are commenting using your Twitter account. Log Out /  Change )

Facebook photo

You are commenting using your Facebook account. Log Out /  Change )

Connecting to %s