Five Minute Friday: Friend

Five Minute Friday

No extreme editing; no worrying about perfect grammar, font, or punctuation.

Unscripted. Unedited. Real.

5 mins of writing on a set topic.

I’ve decided that if I ever wanted to do more writing….and to really get serious about it then I need to be able to just write.  Simply write.  So I’m going to join some friends linking up at Lisa-Jo’s blog and we shall see what fun ensues…..

So here goes….



For the longest time I’ve held onto this hurt.

The hurt that comes from years of being on the outer.  Having ‘friends’ and making acquaintances, but always being on the outer.

I’ve tried to grow my skin thicker.

I’ve invited and initiated.

It is amazing how much it can hurt to be excluded – not on purpose – but just by the by…..

And for me it boils down to this one thing:  not being on anyone’s speed dial.  It hurts.

Not having anyone walk into my kitchen, turn the kettle on and know where to find the tea and coffee.

And just this week I realized why it hurts so very much – and I realized the good that I’ve learnt from this time.  You see I’m so blessed to have known what it is to have such dear friends in my life – to have kindred spirits walk beside me and with me. Through the thick and thin, the curveballs of life and the victories, the glories. What a gift I have had and not every woman has experienced this for themselves.

So I will no longer lament what I do not have right now – instead I will be grateful and remember those dear to me, that I can call ‘friend’, who used to have me on their speed dial, and soon will once again have me, one button’s push away.





23 thoughts on “Five Minute Friday: Friend

  1. I really appreciate your honesty here. I’ve felt like this too, especially recently. It’s hard when you used to be surrounded by people and you suddenly find yourself ‘alone.’ It’s hard, just as you say, when no one knows where your tea is. I’m praying for you lady, and know that despite the loneliness in your life, you are not alone. (And I’d drink tea with you!)

    • thank you!!!! I’ve come a very long way I know, but my days can still be long and very quiet. That’s just what it is. I’d love a cuppa with you!

  2. I think perhaps we are in the same boat. All of my deepest friendships lie outside of my hometown. I also long for the friend who knows where to find the tea and coffee, who stops by on a whim or calls in the middle of the day to rant. I wrote about what I’ve learned from that. Nice to meet you through FMF.

    • Nice to meet you too!! It does take time for these deep friendships to blossom, and I have to say I do have some great people around me here, there is just not that interaction and ease I am used to….those phone calls on a whim….I am glad you understand where I am coming from. I am grateful for those who have welcomed me with open arms here……

  3. ‘..And for me it boils down to this one thing: not being on anyone’s speed dial. It hurts…’ yes, this. I know this well, and am just coming out of a similar season. Really honest post, one that really resonated with me. Thank you

    • The good thing is the news is not all bad – and I hope I portray that enough…..I am glad you are coming out of this season! Progress – always hold onto progress 🙂

  4. Oh, friend. My heart hears yours. I’m so sorry for what you describe here and also thankful for the honesty with which you speak. I know that so many can relate. I dearly hope to be able to meet you in the flesh before you move back home. Sending you love!

  5. Sister, I feel you. Your words spoke to my heart and I know exactly how you feel. I can initiate and invite all I want but after that the ball’s not in your court and it’s hard to let go of that control. Especially when things haven’t always come back the way you want. All I can say is keep going, keep trying, keep holding on because it’s always better in the end. And if it’s not better, it’s not the end. Hugs!!

    • Amen!!! (And its not all bad….it is just……not as good as it could be, because I’ve been blessed to know such goodness….)

  6. We are in the same boat- with the longing to have a friend that just comes on over for tea whenever. The friends in life that are the ones who are really there live in other states. I am grateful for Skype chats and phone calls though! It would just be nice to have some local ladies to share life with. Ironically the friends I have in real life that live nearby don’t answer their phones…so. People chalk it up to being “too busy” now, but I think to myself, should one really be too busy to have time for a friend? I think not! 😉 I love to throw themed tea parties, and would invite you on over if you lived close by.

    • I’d love a themed tea party! I’m so sorry you’re in the same boat – but it is a little bit nice to know it is not JUST ME….from the comments here… seems to be a bit of a thing these days….and it is hard for those of us that know what this deep and meaningful friendship is – to not have it.

      • agree. I wonder if it has anything to do with modern lifestyles? When I was younger (before cell phones and facebook) I actually got real phone calls more and friends wanted to stop by. I also think it’s curious how in my grandparents day they had much more labor to do , as there were not the modern conveniences , and yet people always entertained and dropped by. You would think today people would be less busy , but maybe a lot of people would rather have text only friendships or something now. I swear the modern technology has something to do with it all. We are more connected than ever, and yet more people are lonelier than ever.

  7. Oh, I feel like I could have written this myself! So many times I’ve lamented that I don’t have any friends that I can call up and ask to meet me for lunch or tea. But I HAVE had some beautiful friendships, and this is a good reminder to treasure them, instead of crying over what I don’t have.

    (By the way, I LOVE your name. If my husband and I ever have a little girl, Fiona is the name we’ve chosen for her.)

    • Really?? Well good luck on the girl getting……we seemed to have got the recipe right for boys and never needed a girl’s name!

      It is good to treasure what we have…but I hear ya…it is hard…especially if you have had the kind of friendship in the past….just know you are not alone in this situation….xxxx

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